May 31, 2016

May Favorites


These monthly favorite posts are quickly becoming something I look forward to. This month there was lots going on. I tried to keep it short, but I don't think I succeeded. There were so many great sharable things that I just couldn't leave out! However, if you only read one thing from this list, make it this post from Love the Here and Now: The Cardinal Rule of Blogging.




Things I Accomplished



+ I made it through my term papers and finals, and passed my classes this past session. These classes were rough, but they definitely inspired some new ways of thinking. I've already start sharing some of my thoughts about the topics we discussed in these classes (with this post), and I've got a few more in mind to share.

+ In other school news, I've decided to take the summer off. Two reasons: I need a break and there isn't anything offered that I need. 

+ One blog design installed, one in the making, and one waiting in the queue. My summer is open! Get yourself in line! Knock on Wood Designs.

+ I watched the entire series of Downton Abbey... twice. Because I love it. I also watched Fortitude, Mr. Selfridge, and am now in season 2 of Vikings. I'm totally counting this as an accomplishment.




Blog Posts



You're Life's Story - Ember Grey
Be the heroine/hero of your own life.

How to Let Go of Guilt - One Salty Kiss
No. It's not easy. But it's still possible.

Shiny Object Syndrome - Love the Here and Now
The struggle is real, folks. REAL.

On Having Depression AND Being a Mom - A Hundred Tiny Wishes
I can relate. I have depression. I'm not a mom, but I want to be. One of my biggest fears is that I won't be able to mentally and emotionally handle being a parent due to my depression and anxiety.

10 Life Hacks - Christine Everyday
Cause we all can use life hacks.

I need to do this. You probably do too. amiright?




Blog Related Things




How to Support Your Favorite Bloggers - Classy, Sassy, & A Bit Smartassy


A Look Inside a a Wordpress Post - Love the Here and Now




Things Found on Facebook



+ So far the only reports of craziness I've seen in the Target bathrooms (or any public bathroom for that matter) have been "normal" and "straight" women acting a fool and making others in the bathroom uncomfortable with their phobic attitudes. Like this story of a women who was peeped on by another woman while she was mid pee. And this story of a women who was accused of being Transgender even though she clearly is not, but even if she were, it shouldn't matter.

+ I saw this article and laughed so hard. Marriage isn't always easy, and you don't always like each other every second of every day. So, the statements about marriage in the article ring true for a lot of people whether you care to admit it or not.

+ I probably could have written this post myself. Even though we've just announced publicly that we are in the process of trying to have a baby, and that I am struggling with infertility, doesn't mean our families and the close friends we have told haven't been guilty of any of the things the author talks about. With about 1.5 million women in the U.S. suffering from infertility, odds are that you know someone who is or has been a warrior in that battle. So, read the article, and don't be that person.

+ Children these days are getting shafted on life experience by helicopter parenting fueled by guilt trips from fear mongers and participation trophies. There I said it. I know I don't have any children (yet), but that doesn't mean I don't get an opinion on how I'd like to raise my child when I have one. This post articulates my feelings exactly (only I was born in the mid 80s and can still remember trick or treating by myself at age 7).




In Case You Missed It



May 26, 2016

Guys Behind the Blog - May


The end of May brings the beginning of summer. UGH. Can we skip the heat and humidity, and go right into the cool crisp days of fall? Anyway, the questions for Guys Behind the Blog this month are right up the summer time alley (I totally made that up... don't laugh). Plus, I can never pass up a good interview with Hubs. His answers are always pretty entertaining, and even though he won't admit it, he likes getting some attention here on the blog.


1. Would you rather have to wear your swimsuit to work OR have to carry around a large beach umbrella open all day at work?
Hubs: Prolly swim trunks. Cause I could get away with that. I don't think I could get an umbrella.
Me: Do what?
Hubs: Although. I could have used that umbrella today as a cane.
Me: Why?
Hubs: My ankle hurts.
Me: *typing away*
Hubs: *looks over* oh. I didn't even know we were doing a questionnaire. Is this the Blogger Men Tell All one?
Me: No. This is a different one, but it's similar.


2. Would you rather play on an MLB team OR get to tour with your favorite band all summer?
Hubs: An MLB team.
Me: Why?
Hubs: I don't know. I like baseball and you get to hit little white balls. It's exhilarating.
Me: What team would you play for?
Hubs: you aren't going to like the answer, but it would be the New York Yankees. Actually a lot of people won't like that answer. But yeah. Either them or the St. Louis Cardinals.
Me: Booooooooo. (GO BRAVES!)


3. Would you rather go to the beach and forget your towel OR go to the beach and forget your sunscreen?
Hubs: Do you really need me to answer that questions?
Me: No. It's sunscreen. (he always complains when I make him put sunscreen on)
Hubs: That's right. I don't need no sunscreen cause I'm a balla!
Me: *laughing* Just don't complain when you get sunburnt.



4. Would you rather take a week-long vacation to anywhere in the world OR take a month-long vacation but have to stay within 100 miles of home?

Hubs: Probably the week to anywhere.
Me: Why?
Hubs: There's not much within a 100 miles from here, and that's depressing.
Me: True. Where would you wanna go?
Hubs: *Strokes his beard* hmmmm... Either Italy or France.
Me: Good choices.


5. Would you rather get to have as much ice cream as you want this summer, but only be able to get vanilla OR only get to have ice cream three times this summer, but you can have whatever flavors you want?
Me: Oh gosh, that's a hard one. I love ice cream, but I don't really like vanilla.
Hubs: Well, with vanilla ice cream you can put toppings on it to make it not so bland. The question didn't have any rules about that!
Me: Oohhh good idea.
Hubs: That's the only kind of ideas I have.
Me: What you're favorite topping then?
Hubs: Crushed butterfingers. Does that count as a topping?
Me: Um, Yes!



After the interview...
Hubs: So is there like a template for these or something?
Me: Sorta. The hosts gives the questions and then we just put in the answers. But I'm one of the only ones who does it conversation style like this.
Hubs: Oh. What do other people do?
Me: Usually one or two line answers from what I've seen.
Hubs: Well that's boring.
Me: It would be boring for you. But I like the conversation style because I can prompt you to say funny things sometimes.
Hubs: Oh, YOU prompt me, huh?
Me: mmm hmmm.
Hubs: I think not. I'm pretty darn funny without prompting. (he really is.)






May 24, 2016

Personality Types and Marriage



A couple of sessions ago, I signed up for the Personality Theory class. The insight I gained about myself in comparison to others is remarkable, and it’s helped me be more comfortable and confident in the path I have chosen. We took the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) in class, but I already had an idea of what my results would be as I had taken a similar test online about a year prior (You can take it for yourself HERE). However, the results from the MBTI differed from the online test by one letter, but only slightly on the scale.

People do change, therefore their personalities change as well, so I took the online test again to see if I would receive the same type as the MBTI taken in class: ISFJ. I did not, I got the same result as I did when I took it a year ago: INFJ. I found a different online test and got INFJ again. When I compared the two types side by side, I felt that I related more to the INFJ descriptions that I did the ISFJ ones.


Our Personality Types

I am an INFJ. This means I am Introverted (I), Intuitive (N), Feeling (F), and Judging (J). A general description is that I seek more out of life than just living it, there has to be a meaning in everything I do. INFJs have a desire to understand the motivations of others, as well as themselves, and generally have an insightful nature when it comes to interacting with those around them. INFJs also have a strong set of core values they can be quite stubborn in upholding. They are never satisfied or at peace with themselves, making them feel like they are always a work in progress, but INFJs believe that they are almost always right (duh) witch makes them come off as stubborn and that they ignore other's opinions.

When Hubs took the MBTI, he received the ISFJ personality score. Introversion (I), sensing (S), and judging (J) were no surprise to me. It was the Feeling (F) that threw me for a loop. I would have pegged my husband as a Thinker (T) instead. Like INFJs, ISFJs are perfectionists, however ISFJs take things far more literally than often intended. They have an exceptional memory when it comes to the people in their lives, and learn best by doing. While their feelings of inadequacy can be quite strong (they are their own worst critic), they are very responsible and make sure the all things in their lives are running smoothly. ISFJs are not very expressive with their feelings (no surprise), and they don't often let on that they know what others are feeling either. 


But what does this mean for us together?

What’s great about our personality types is that they are so similar, however this can also pose some significant problems as well. Due to our introversion, we struggle, at times, with communication. We keep our feelings and emotions locked up when we should be sharing them with each other. Being Intuitive though, we still have an idea about wha the other is thinking and feeling. However, I often read farther into his comments and statements than I should, and he doesn’t read into mine as deeply as I’d like him to. This is something we have been working on, and will probably have to work on for the duration of our marriage (forever, duh).

Another, hilariously, accurate description I found for our personality types together is that Hubs doesn’t understand why I can’t keep up with the laundry and dishes. This is because I get lost in my thoughts and forget about doing them. I literally laughed out loud when I read about this, and said to my husband “That’s so us!” Knowing these types of things about each other helps us to take a step back and not be so reactive when things don't go our own way.

Enough with the negative, because there are some amazing things about and INFJ-ISFJ marriage. We balance each other out: he keeps me grounded, while I encourage him to dream a little more. He’s amazing with our finances, and I have the ability to let go and let him take the reigns where money is concerned. We both understand the other’s need to have “me time” and are very good listeners when we actually open up and talk to each other. As feeling types, we can be more in tune with each other’s feelings surround a conflict and take great care not to hurt the other. Finally, we are both planners (INFJ and ISFJ – Compatibility, Relationships, and Friendships).  

The key to any relationship, though, is a good sense of humor. If we don’t laugh at and with one another from time to time, I don’t think anyone would make it.


Take the test. Have your partner take the test. Then check out the relationship sections to see how you compare. You can learn so much. 

Have you every taken a personality test before? Did you learn something new about yourself?


References
Cox, B. (2011, November 10). It's Hard To Be an INFJ---The Rarest Myers-Briggs Personality Type. Retrieved October 4, 2015, from http://beaconstreetusa.com/wp/its-hard-to-be-an-infj/
INFJ. (n.d.). Retrieved October 4, 2015, from http://www.truity.com/personality-type/infj
INFJ Personality ("The Advocate"). (n.d.). Retrieved October 4, 2015, from http://www.16personalities.com/infj-personality
INFJ and ISFJ – Compatibility, Relationships, and Friendships. (n.d.). Retrieved October 5, 2015, from http://personalitygrowth.com/infj-and-isfj-compatibility-relationships-and-friendships/
ISFJ-INFJ Relationship. (n.d.). Retrieved October 5, 2015, from http://www.personality-central.com/ISFJ-INFJ.html
Portrait of an INFJ. (n.d.). Retrieved October 4, 2015, from https://www.personalitypage.com/INFJ.html
Portrait of an INFJ. (n.d.). Retrieved October 4, 2015, from http://www.personalitypage.com/ISFJ.html